pre-emptive good morning in case i forget, which is likely because i'm very busy and important and often forget to log in to bloard on a daily basis because i'm extremely important, in my community, i'm on the board of trustees for my township of 2300 people in the great state of Ohio, my job isn't important, i'll give you a hint it's related to the knights of columbus building function on friday nights for the elderly, it involves the word bingo, won't get too specific, anyway, just wnated to get in here pre-early (like 12 hours early) and say good morning, but just assume i'm saying it for saturday morning, sorry to keep hammering the point but i'm seriously busy, i don't really have time for bloard all the time, i love you bloarders/bloardettes out there, also those that bloarder/bloardette doesn't cover, love you all, just really busy, thanks for being there, just been busy, please don't forget to subscribe to my channel, but like i said i'm sorry i don't bloard every night shit's just been crazy with my job and the township, you know old bonnie f. has been needing extra help getting in and out of her car on friday nights, just part of the job, again please like and subscribe, i'll try to keep streaming on a regular basis because i know you all out there love that PUBG (it ain't dead yet!) and whatnot but just i want to thank all your bloarders/bloardettes/bloardxrs out there, stay strong, love you all, thanks, peace out, cya

i dont blieve in twitter, when u die u just die

i'm the worst poster here, and everyone hates me even mom, it's possible i'm the one for the task

Since the Real Life immigration ban is very very popular in real life thanks to President Donald Drumpf, I suggest we implement our own Board Immigration Ban ourselves to prevent really shit posters from posting in our Bloard. Those who agree, please +1 this post, those who oppose, please state why you support Shit fucking posters coming in Ruining this great fucking place please ( I will not hesitate to flame you)

meatloaf i'm well aware it's not technically bread but i use two slices of meatloaf and put a piece of bread on the inside of it and make an "anti-sandwich" that i usually eat on the way to the library-gym where i work out and also read books, the problem is that i have not found a good way to keep my hands clean while driving because i put copious amounts of ketchup on the outsides of the anti-'wich (i'll refer to it as the antwich from hereon) and the ketchup tends to get all over the steering wheel and the gym equipment and books , my mom suggested i put the ketchup on the inside but it's harder to get the perfect bite when doing so, you know what i mean?

currently dropping [b]hot streams[/b] as i type this gingerly so as to not disturb the delicate balance of the laptop on my knee (balancing the laptop on my right leg which is proppe dup on the seat while my left leg is curled under my rear, i have to aim up in an arc so th shit almost done, i'll finish what i was saying next time i have to drop them [b]steamy liq's[/b]

[quote=blandkidneystone;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fbloard-conspiracies%2Fposts%2F6118] I have a theory but im scared to talk about it as it might ruin some friendships 😕😕 [/quote] is the conspiracy that you have friends 😂👏

*pensively eyes thread*

I have a .22 rifle, a hunting bow +quiver with razorheads, blast knuckles with fresh batteries, 3 katanas, and a Hylian Shield replica made of hardwood that I can wear on my arm or sling over my back. My martial arts experiences include my Blue Belt at Tiger ((Shulman's)) Karate and 2 PE credits from applied Tai Chi Quan... Plus watching a lot of kung-fu movies and fighting games. My defense rating is at least 6/10. I've never been beaten up or knocked out and the last fight I got into was with a 6'2 meathead that ended after a headbutted him in the eyesocket.

Hello, Currently I'm Unironically reading [i]Infinite Jest[1][/i]. I'm about 70 pages in (including its infamous footnotes) [Kindle version - I"m not carrying around a fucking thousand page book. Actually I'm reading it on my ipad[2], it's super useful because i can also carry all of my music on it and my teaching materials as well, so that i can just pull up whatever i feel like working on with a student wherever i am and print it out so they can have a copy without forcing them to buy a book or needing to remember to print out a bunch of shit 20 minutes before a lesson and end up getting there to the studio late and then i'm scramblin' to teach them some new BS before the next student shows up and i have to cut their time short as well-- you have to be on time with these soccer moms and shit. So anyway I'm reading the footnote compliation of the Incandenza father's filmography (James iirc - my ipad is charging and i don't feel like looking at it rn). I had to put it down because I had to pee, and decided that a pee break was a good time to start a thread about books and workouts. But anyway yeah really good book. I used to hate reading. I think that's turning around. Short blurb - also been listening to Nietzsche on Audible, currently plodding through The Gay Science. It's alright. If you've read/listened to it i don't really need to talk about it. I like the narrorator's voice. (The guy who narrated Kierkegaard's [i]The Concept of Anxiety[/i] sucked ass, couldn't finish listening to it) Current workout reoutine: I'm on a full week rotation rn: Arms, core, legs, Arms, core, legs, Rest day. Repeat. I will switch it up occasionally and I try to vary my actual exercises. For example I won't do leg press 3 leg day's in a row, i'll instead vary whatever I'm doing. It keeps it interesting. For example this week I'm trying farm carries for the first time instead of shoulder shrugs, but will also work on my grip strength, (which is already rock solid as i'm an upright bass player). It's kind of hard because my local Planet Fitness gets chock full of highschool students bumbling around because it's down the street from the local HS, and for some reason they're still there 3 hours later at 530 when i come after work. Like wtf kids don't you have homework? get lost. Honestly though I have no idea what i'm doing haha. But i'm not as disgusting as I was a year ago. Feel me? I skipped today however, Sunday is normally my rest day but I think i'm going to do a combined core-leg day because i've been eating a lot this week. I'm not on any specific diet, no protein shakes, no BCAAs etc etc. No creatine. Honestly this is just more about being in shape in general, not bulking or building, yeah? ANy suggestions about workout routines? What books are you reading (or listening via your Amazon®️ Audible™ app)? [1]Infinite Jest Paperback – November 13, 2006 by David Foster Wallace (Author) 3.9 out of 5 stars 1,250 customer reviews Paperback: 1079 pages <- I have the kindle version, don't know how accurate this is Publisher: Back Bay Books; Anniversary edition (November 13, 2006) Language: English ISBN-10: 0316066524 ISBN-13: 978-0316066525 [2] a family memeber gave me their 7-year old ipad for christmas. still works damn well. battery don't last too long tho.

*ssshhhcktsssssss* I open the can of alcoholic sugar water, and begin my Bloard badposting spree under its diabetes-inducing spell... [img]https://i.imgur.com/n1zbs3R.jpg[/img]

[img]https://i.imgur.com/Tu94zHF.gif[/img]

your mom wanted it last night so i guess ya 😂😂😂

didn't end up shitting at the jim today. [quote=kingdad42;%2Fbloards%2Fgym_bloard%2Ftopics%2Fwelcum-to-gym-bloard%2Fposts%2F6441] it also suffers from joss whedon's stupid quippy writing style, which i abhor. [/quote] this

[quote=littleerik;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fplans-to-bring-in-more-bloard-users%2Fposts%2F5797] please enjoy the posts [/quote] dont do this

Every thread is safe if you're packing heat.

prevention, irony, laughter, time, stuff like that.

nope still havent read a goddamned thing

Nope. No posts here, boss. Just some gay fart smells wafting around.

[quote=dereklaserbeam;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Ftinder%2Fposts%2F6478] i met my gf on yahoo personals 😎 [/quote] what s his name

[quote=kingdad42;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fplans-to-bring-in-more-bloard-users%2Fposts%2F5607] Maybe a Bloard pot luck where we all make bloard inspired food [/quote] im assuming you mean giant platters of nothing but crumbs of various sorts

blood-soaked toast

worst kneeler in church (bad knees)

haha guys real funny *brings fist down onto desk dramatically while turning red*

i'm feelin one of these bad boys right here 👉 [img]https://i.imgur.com/UnbCr37.png[/img]

cool, can i be the fat useless one? haha it's a joke based on reality

[quote=wowneat;%2Fbloards%2FHorny_bloard%2Ftopics%2Fwhat-get-s-your-thang-going%2Fposts%2F5410] just kind of feel it out, no real prefs here. let my hands do the walkin and talkin, yeah? normally i get slapped public but i got lucky in a dark room with my parents once. [/quote] i feel the need to clarify this post which was obviously misinterpreted which is why i recieved not as many plus one's as i should of. just because my parents were in the room doens't mean that i was letting my hands "talk to them" so to speak. i just happened to be in the same room as my parents when the power went out while we were at a sex-havers-only party, which was held at highly secretive place which i will not tell you, but it's related to a jordan peterson fanclub afterparty, before which we viewed like 2 and a half videos of his on youtube. anyway, the power went out, and so my hands started doing what they do best, i must have felt like at least 5 or 7 boobs, roughly, i won't go into too much detail, the details aren't important, but yeah it really got my thing going, so to speak, i hope you understand what i mean by this.

*face continues to get increasingly red out of rage and embarrassment* HAHAHA I LOVE LAUGHING WITH YOU GUYS

ate like shit today. can't wait for leg day tomorrow so i fall asleep on the way home from overexertion after carb overload in the car and crash into a ditch and my parents donate my bloard account to starving children in the bronx.

[quote=hillips;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fnew-meme-exe%2Fposts%2F4073] [img]https://i.imgur.com/drnERzN.jpg[/img] [/quote] To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Rick’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they’re not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick & Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick’s existential catchphrase “Wubba Lubba Dub Dub,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev’s Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon’s genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. And yes, by the way, i DO have a Rick & Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

yeah dude, heil fartquad

getting my hog ready

Have to agree here. Not into books. But Bloard? that's a different story

hot take: what if bloardman is really 3 ants in an incel costume

Please do not Necro Old Fucking threads Thanks

[quote=bug%20deal;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Freal-talk-the-bloard-thread-with-a-strict-no-irony-policy%2Fposts%2F6130] I really want to die asap. can’t talk to anyone about that though. that’s just the depression talking, or i’m obligated to report this to the authorities. or something like that, is what various people would say. [/quote] sorry to hear that my dude. as cliche as it sounds, don't feel guilty about reaching out or asking for help especially when you need to. i'm sure the fellow bloarders would give you permission to go seek help even when you can't give yourself permission 👌

people tell me a mysterious and horrible odour follows me around, can't seem to find the source, will keep everyone updated

Keep posting, I'm reloading.

Not a swearer personally, just droppin by

today's my day off so i was going ask my fellow bloardmen. the trainer at my Local Planet fitness keeps giving me the "you don't look repulsive to me" eyes, which i think may be a trap, because i am actually a giant walking 50-gallon black contractor's trashbag filled to the top with hair and lard. She was at the desk when i slathered my way up and gave the little keykard thing attached to my keychain thing for her to scan, and she gave me those eyes, so i blurted out "BLOARD DOT COM" and then coughed because i choked on my own spit a little which a little of which flew out of my mouth onto her yellow trainer shirt that said "trainer",i quickly grabbed my keychain and quickly waddled to the bathroom where i nervously began to fart a lot while my face turned the color of an embarrassed beet. do you guys think i have a chance? i hope she gets on Bloard, and she can come in this thread and talk about bloard, and also gym bloard-related stuff, what do you guys think? she doesn't have a nametag, so i don't know what her name is, other than "Trainer," i'm thinking she looks like a Christy or Natalie, something with a long "E" sound at the end, she's very pretty, and my bowels are starting to loosen thinking about the whole situation. thoughts?