whole post is a sham. everything i have ever posted on here has been non ironic, i did it first. all my posts are truth

[quote=yoshifanatic1488;%2Fbloards%2Fmusical_bloard%2Ftopics%2Fget-in-here-we-talkin-about-vidya-game-music%2Fposts%2F10141] mario [/quote] never heard of him.

[img]https://i.imgur.com/ghCojFv.png[/img] huh....

[quote=RaymondMoist;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fcool-movies%2Fposts%2F10114] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJfBaXhmrzc [/quote] you expect us to believe this shit? You really think we would believe some sh*t like "red paint comes from rocks" or that they sent paint into space?? this film is ridiculous

[quote=RaymondMoist;%2Fbloards%2Fgym_bloard%2Ftopics%2Fwelcum-to-gym-bloard%2Fposts%2F10102] ah yea hey, can't talk now. My fern garden has a lot of aphids g2g cya around. [/quote] haha yeah me too bro (huffs) , couldnt even talk if i wanted (puffs) im a bout to launch this ten thousand pound barbell right through the fucking gold's gym wall

bloard juice can only be drunk from the mythic bloardstone chalice, otherwise you will disintegrate.

[quote=orgamecha;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F10024] i dont want a dnd character sheet [/quote] you are the beast. your stats are incredibly powerful

[quote=beefsnack;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fim-beefsnack%2Fposts%2F10069] im pigfoot_vermont [/quote] that guy owes me a dollar

taylor swift used to be on bloard she let us name her kitten "retarsd"

[quote=beefsnack;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fim-beefsnack%2Fposts%2F10029] proof? [/quote] i have banished you from france

[quote=beefsnack;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fim-beefsnack%2Fposts%2F10022] ⠀ [/quote] sure thing buddy, and im the queen of france

holy shit. you were all so distracted by this crazy scenario you didnt even spot "wheres waldos" himself standing right in the middle of it

the biscotti policy: that biscotti guy is banned from my nightclub, asshole , grabbing crotches, chests and asses

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9990] wow rail road much? i wanted to get creative with the hobbit murders... whatever... i shoot myself in the fucking face [/quote] *you roll 3, the bullet bounces off your chin and hits you in the foot*

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9987] I head north to hobbit village. before i arrive i lock my tweets and turn off notifcations, and i smear some of funzo's remains on my face, two long vertical funzo lines under my eyes like the wolf princess from princess mononoke [/quote] (you approach the village and see a small hobbit playing in the shrub. in a matter of minutes they are all dead and jack from twitter has slapped a big ban on your account as screenshots of you knifing an elderly hobbit leaked on to twitter)

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9980] Bullshit he doesn't. I attempt a non lethal attack on him to incapacitate him, so I can take him to hobbit village with me. [/quote] you deal 4 damage to funzo, instantly decimating his 4 hp, his head crumbles under your hand like a sandcastle and he screams. (you scrape his remains into a little bag for safekeeping)

beefsnack you have got 4 strength. 6 intelligence and 5 charisma every go you can move 2 feet if you roll above a 3 and can move 20 feet if you roll under 3 (due to having funny crazy slinky legs) your alignment is chaotic good you your personality is having a crocodile mouth with sharp teeth, everyone is impressed by that incredible crocodile jaw and its mighty biting, giving you +4 to charisma your bond is the eastern gnome village you love all the gnomes and their village and are sworn to defend them. your flaws are that being made of raw meat, crows and foxes will follow you around hoping for a snack

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9972] I ask him what's small, has a wand, and says "owiwieieiwiwieowwowowie" [/quote] he does a massive chuckle, and with a giant friendly grin on his face he points you north to the hobbit village and animal rescue sanctuary knowing full well the consequence of his actions

there may be a gun but.. i have the only bullets. (jangles pocket in your face)

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9960] I go looking for hobbits to murder. Do I see any tracks? Where is the nearest shire? [/quote] in one stride you move exactly 40 feet and come across “funzo the party wizard” who will show you to the hobbits if you can tell a joke and make him chuckle. or you can beat the shit out of him he only has 4 hp

no more mental raving [youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mk1Y8fqXafk[/youtube]

[quote=dick%20chappy;%2Fbloards%2FGameing%2Ftopics%2Fi-will-write-you-d-d-character-sheet%2Fposts%2F9955] 👐 [/quote] dick chappy you have 5 strength 7 intelligence and 4 charisma you can move 100 feet per go (horse legs), you have got 25 hit points and deal 7 hit points when unarmed you have a lawful good alignment and your personal trait is your noble "chap blood" means you are a person of nobility and great esteem in the kingdom :) your bonds are your large collection of beanie babies and desert storm trading cards from the 90s your flaw is that every go you roll a dice and if it lands on any number above 4 you become scared and die instantly

little erik your strength is 40 your intelligence is 5 and your charisma is 6. you can move 10 feet per go (bigerik can move 60) you have 30 hit points and can deal 10 hit points unarmed your alignment is chaotic good. your personality trait is shouting "hey numbnuts" and then bashing a guys skull in, you also like to farm, but nothing useful its just a big ant farm your bonds are a strong affiliation for hot dogs and burgers done on a bbq on a nice summers day :) but your flaw is that your sword always has a snide remark whenever you hit something and will insult anyone in earshot which takes 5 off of your charisma. also you can never put the sword down its like... attached or something.

jerry. your strength is 4 your intelligence is 6 and you charisma is 5 every go you can move up to 40 feet due to regular walks to the park and good running shoes. you have 35 hit points and can deal 4 hit points unarmed your alignment is lawful neutral, your personality trait is being able to identify dog breeds from incredible distances, you pretend its not a big deal but in reality you are very proud of it. your bonds are your large collection of carefully hand cut coupons which ensure great deals at all merchants partnered with amex but your flaws are an unrelenting hobbit bloodlust, you keep killing hobbits. every time you see a hobbit your only option is to strike with overwhelming force. this takes 3 away from your charisma, and also twitter is upset at you for it but you will deal criticals on all hobbits.

comment and i will write your d&d character sheet for free

guys.. is the bee gone yet?

. . \__/

i look at the camera. the crowd laughs, the credits roll. the terrifying charade is over. [img]https://i.imgur.com/9qkyjwG.png[/img]

[quote=bug%20deal;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2F8fcc0ee0-3155-4fa6-bbe8-a3a1c4585b20%2Fposts%2F9860] I can't mmake that first line match up. well I've been through the desert on a horse with no name well I've been ___on__the bloard ___ thread with no name sigh. no standards these days... no pride in workmanship [/quote] no no no. to sing this you stretch the “oar” of bloard so it conforms to the melody and covers the “on a horse” section and the “thread” of the “thread with no name” part is sped up to fit, so it would be more like: “well i’ve been on the blo-oard thread-with-no-name” this is all robust music theory, it all makes sense

i am the bloard paladin and i have 50 armour rerolls

[quote=beefsnack;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Felemental-bending-thread%2Fposts%2F9835] hernie [/quote]

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fcrime-bloard%2Fposts%2F8399] I positioned my body in such a way that I created negative pressure in my abdomen and reverse farted. Not recently, this was when I was like 12. [/quote] sounds like the classic “ass vacuum” (ass cuum for short)

hernie

im a postbender. my element is posts and i am in full control of them

well ive been on the bloard thread with no name, it felt good to get out of the rain. (la la lala la laaa laaaa la)

[img]https://i.imgur.com/6IdbJoq.png[/img] buhhhhhhhh-loard

[quote=jerry;%2Fbloards%2Fmath%2Ftopics%2Fthe-bloard-number%2Fposts%2F9257] 421 [/quote] lol haha its almost weed number

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[/img] 😏 hey wassup.. 😩 (the titanic flexes its giant huge boat muscles) (the titanic then proceeds to sit in the corner with a very self satisfied grin, you know the titanic is only here to prove its the big boat on campus and to make all the small boats feel shame in their stature)

can i be in your divorce selfie?

guys. cut that shit out.