the war is over. I count 7 on the side of bookbloard, and a sad solitary 1, the illiterate snooby, on the other side, soon to be exiled to fuck bloard

I actually enjoyed driving a forklift when I did it for a little while

blaordurly

[quote=joop;%2Fbloards%2FHi_all_Ralp_here_welcome_to_my_Bloard%2Ftopics%2Fwhat-if%2Fposts%2F2808] you take the blue pill—the story ends, you wake up in your ergonomic shikibuton and keep posting rare pepes and getting agitated by game journalists on twitter. you take the bloard pill—you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the No Irony thread goes [/quote] i crush the board pill and snort it to get an instant and intense high. i'm so jacked up and tuned in i post in the right bloard for once. it doesn't get any better than this.

going to the gym...at lunch break. going to eat a gym mat and that chalk shit

[img]http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20130816/epazenyb.jpg[/img]

i fling open the saloon doors to Bloard. a tubmlewead of doghair rolls through. at a table sits some zak guy shouting raceistly. the room has no other patrons. from behind the bar, bloardman, taking a shot of 300-proof urine: bloards dead, he says. i step fully into the room. the saloon doors creak behind me. i tip my hat. it rips in half because its a piece of shit burger king crown. fuck that, i say, and start shooting from the hip. i dont have any guns, so i'm just spitting and pointing my fingers. bloards back, baby.

what's bloard

I made mac and cheese last night was delicious. boil 8 Oz noodles. duMP them out in a strainer when tbeyre do e. put 6 Oz of evaporated milk mixed up with an egg and some butter and a touch of mustard and 8 Oz of cheddar in the pot and melt all that shit together. throw the fuckin noodles back in. stir all that shit together. it's good

i dragged some dumpsters around and pulled a garbage truck with my teeth and wrestled homeless people. it's called the "practical urban workout"

i enjoy only two or so cigs per annum, but relish the experience

[quote=dereklaserbeam;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Freal-talk-the-bloard-thread-with-a-strict-no-irony-policy%2Fposts%2F2467] i'm not. i think smoking looks cool. 😎 [/quote] i must agree that they look cool and are fun to smoke and make you feel cool

i keep posting in the wrong bloard.

[quote=hillips;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Ftext-posts-about-the-image-thread-with-no-text%2Fposts%2F2449] bahaha. is reaL? [/quote] it's real

You can work out your muscles all you want, but if your brain isn't fit, you'll never make those huge gains. I came across this product Alpha Brain on the Joe Rogan Experience, and it's good, but let me share a little tip: when you get out of bed in the morning, drink 1 litre of ice cold water, dump an entire jar of Alpha Brain in your mortar, grind it into a powder with your pestle, than snort that shit with a toilet paper roll. I've never been so focused. I can see the other 95% of the unknown universe. I'm making gains like never before. I'm deadlifting 7,000 pounds. I'm using my 200lbs pure-muscle Crossfit gf as a medicine ball and whipping her clear across the continent. I'm kettlebell swinging a ford focus for 900 reps, no rest. I do pushups for three weeks straight, no rest, on the JRE GorillaGrip MAXfuck pushup grips. use. the. code. name. ro. gan.

My life forever altered by a visage appeared in a slice of toast. Mustache. A bulbous nose. A hat, emblazoned with "M." Foretold, truth, in my bread. I spread the word. My wife, apostate, left me. My children, estranged by my "madness." No, my prophecy. Toast taken on pilgrimage to the Vactican. An audience with the Pope. The Pope said: "No Christ, this." I smirk. "Certainly not. Much more." The Pope labels me heretic. I murder him with his hat, continue on with the toast. Prophet.

i'm going to the gym in 1.5 hours then i'm going home to eat beans

[img]http://www.threadbombing.com/data/media/3/happy_beluga.jpg[/img]

because I have brain aids

who is lihon?

I ate probably 6 pounds of plantains this week

[quote=yoshifanatic1488;%2Fbloards%2Ftghe%2Ftopics%2Fcapitalism-megathread%2Fposts%2F2315] is it good or bad? i think its bad. sorry but thats just how i feel. [/quote] I think it's a little bit of both, you know? like that famous russian saying by john lennin "Ying and yang?"

hypernormalization was cool but i think it was a little too much doom and gloom for the sake of doom and gloom

own a computger

[img]https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/04/cc/b5/04ccb559227b69784daf984cb23dd0f4.jpg[/img]

I'm actually going to the actual gym tonight. i'm going to self-actualize by actually moving heavy objects with my actual limbs, repeatedly. i actually had a wide-grip bar get flung through my actual frontal cortex, and now my actual broca area is actually broca-en.

From: NASA subject: re: Michelob Ultra Hello all, Codeword "Michelob Ultra" is a highly sensitive, security level 4hIII project. Please refrain from using it on public message bloards. Thank you, Neil Armsrtong

I was eating a deep dish pizza while driving and my hands slipped off the steering wheel and I drove into a preschool and the little bastards rushed me and ate my pizza.

Are you not going to the Oscars either?

One time my wife and I won a visit to an expensive spa. When we got there, we were instructed to take off all our clothes and go into the showers. We did. Then an extremely tall woman who didn't speak any English came into the room and hosed us down and scrubbed us with this big, long handled brush. I felt like a zoo animal. An elephant, in particular. Yes, I posted this in the correct thread.

there are several famous bloard users

[quote=kingdad42;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fwhats-up%2Fposts%2F2002] Nice, we got a dolphin on here now. I'm good, just getting ready for work. Gonna juice some produce so I can save time and not have to chew it. Also got another 35 pound kettlebell in the mail today. Going to bring the gym home with me so I can always be at the gym, while posting on Bloard!!!! [/quote] you can get 35lbs of iron in the mail? lol. seriously tho I want iron to come to me in the mail

bloard

[img]https://mattsko.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/airplane-hat-2.jpg[/img]

jeff bezos is a bloardist

I'm reading a book by a lunatic that says you should take 20 minute ice water baths to burn fat.

I ate some vegetables and am now staring longingly at the moon. hello, moon. when will you come home? why did you leave me, moon? moon.

Unironically, I think my knees have ebola. I am in joint pain. Glucosamine is witch doctory, right?

went to the gmy last night.

popular with the ladies: bloardman