doing the old ass piss. thats right its diarrhea folks 👨👨

its boring as crap NERD SHIT!!!

[quote=hillips;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fbumper-sticker-ideas%2Fposts%2F5121] thats a cool sticker d. must be hard to find a holocaust survivor an ex slave in this day and age and then run them over with your car but i believe you [/quote] i think its gonna be harder for d to have an abortion 😭😭😭😂

[quote=joop;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fthe-crumb-check-thread%2Fposts%2F5180] as a rule i do not eat any food that can produce crumbs [/quote] you tellin me you never ate a oreo? callin bs on that one

*hard cut to fat ugly balding kingdad42 sitting on the library computer on pigfoot's account scowling and clicking post*

I'm a fake person too. I only befriend those who make me look cool, so I can in turn look cooler. I also don't wash any parts of my body that clothes will cover, because hell, I'm the only one seeing that shit anyways. Who gives a hoot!

WTF

bump

Just look at my posts and click +1. That's how you bloard.

im sit pissing

i actually think i might get this. loved FTL. will update once i've played

Rough idea outline: Frankenstein drinking Jizz, but he drinks too much and gets pregnant. Need to make it relevant to today's political climate. Possibly say something about guns.

[img]https://i.pinimg.com/736x/17/51/0a/17510a40d700cad85bbf898b0ea5b72f--cambodia-zoom.jpg[/img]

“Want your Bloard, Joopie?' Pennywise asked. 'I only repeat myself because you really do not seem that eager.' He held it up, smiling. He was wearing a baggy silk suit with great big orange buttons. A bright tie, electric-blue, flopped down his front, and on his hands were big white gloves, like the kind Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck always wore. Yes, sure,' Joop said, looking into the stormdrain. And a Swann? I’ve got red and green and yellow and blue...' Do they post?' Post?' The clown’s grin widened. 'Oh yes, indeed they do. They post! And there’s Bloardman...' Joop reached. The clown seized his arm. And Joop saw the clown’s face change. What he saw then was terrible enough to make his worst imaginings of the thing in the cellar look like sweet dreams; what he saw destroyed his sanity in one clawing stroke. They post,' the thing in the drain crooned in a clotted, chuckling voice. It held Joop's arm in its thick and wormy grip, it pulled Joop toward that terrible darkness where the water rushed and roared and bellowed as it bore its cargo of storm debris toward the sea. Joop craned his neck away from that final blackness and began to scream into the rain, to scream mindlessly into the white autumn sky which curved above the internet on that day in the fall of 1957. His screams were shrill and piercing, and all up and down Twitter people came to their Timelines or bolted out into their DMs. They post,' it growled, 'they post, Joopie, and when you’re down here with me, you’ll post, too–' Joop's shoulder socked against the cement of the curb and hillips, who had stayed home from his job at The Dick Sucking Factory that day because of the flood, saw only a small boy in a yellow rain-slicker, a small boy who was screaming and writhing in the gutter with muddy water surfing over his face and making his screams sound bubbly. Everything down here posts,' that chuckling, rotten voice whispered, and suddenly there was a ripping noise and a flaring sheet of agony, and Joop knew no more.

i had some ramen with 3 eggs

It's a place where we come to post sometimes. Some threads are good, some suck shit!!!

Funny, I too was invited to work out in Erik's garage. The instructions he gave me took me down a winding country road with almost no lights to speak of. I don't think anyone lives that far out, or at least I didn't at the time. I was just about to turn back when I saw his "house" in the clearing. [img]https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7iYK7SK_ZDI/VsDN47tjwYI/AAAAAAAAAi8/LWOcqUyr6AU/s1600/15.08.29.1.JPG[/img] Against my better judgement I decided to be polite and knock on the door. "Little" Erik (he was 6'8 and weighed at least 400 lbs by my recollection) opened the door and walking me inside towards the "fitness room". What was in there was appalling, a dirty rusted up toilet, a toddler's trike with a computer monitor tied to the handlebars, and some rusted up scrap metal he called weights, but I didn't want to be rude so I feigned a simple workout while I planned my escape. I must not have been paying much attention, I was a little freaked out, because Erik slipped away for a moment and came back looking like this (I managed to snap a picture): [img]https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ov3oKe7mBZo/maxresdefault.jpg[/img] He kept saying "now the real workout can begin" and throwing ants all over me. I couldn't take it anymore and took off the "workout chains" he threw on me earlier, and made my escape. The whole time he was chasing my car and crying before I finally lost him and got back home. I don't think Little Erik cares about working out at all, and I highly discourage anyone from going to his garage for sets and reps. This Little Erik guy is kind of a jerk!

My Bloarders don't care about your Stick Family (with an image of bloarders holding down the father in front of the rest of them and shitting on his mcmotherbitching face!!!!!!)

kuso yarou!!!

I think Bloard will be a great community, but only if people can show some freaking self restraint. One time I was in my office and I got a text from a bloarder who will at this moment not be named. He kept texting me so I blocked his number, and the motherchode gave me a freaking spyware on my work computer. I haven't said anything to my boss yet, but he keeps getting messages from me that say "What's his name lol", and I think he's starting to get suspicious.

horses have butt cheeks

[quote=yoshifanatic1488;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fmy-new-year-s-resolution-fail-updated%2Fposts%2F4630] 1080p [/quote] HOLY SHIT LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let's get cozy. :) [img]https://iso.500px.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/winners_cover-1500x1000.jpg[/img] [youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcRXO5vVcRg[/youtube]

Smurfs wouldn't even make the mother fucking list. Nasty blue fuckers.

[quote=joop;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Freal-talk-the-bloard-thread-with-a-strict-no-irony-policy%2Fposts%2F4804] for clarification, what i recommended in the way of hypertrophy programs is for building muscle SIZE, not strength (though of course more size = more strength). I wasn't suggesting you always follow that high-rep, mid-intensity scheme [/quote] i just do a 5x5 with the heaviest weight i can manage, mainly around benching, deadlifting, squatting, and then other smaller stuff with freeweights and whatnot. i don't put as much thought into it as i need to though.

crap, i gotta look into this. sounds really complex though. i thought working out was just about picking up heavy things.... now i have to do f&*#ing math....

That sounds really complicated. Also what do you mean by volume of work you can do in a week? Like just going as much as possible, doing more weight or more reps or what?? Sometimes if I overdo it I feel it in my tendons and have to back off a little bit. I want to get as big and strong as possible!!

[img]https://memegenerator.net/img/instances/74321810.jpg[/img]

[quote=littleerik;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Fderek-s-closet-confessions%2Fposts%2F4782] makes sense. that's legally when you can do it. [/quote] I'm too scared to start masturbating. I'm almost 30 and have never done it. I'd probably not be any good at it anyways so who cares, haha.

Welcome to Bloard. It's a very inviting community, and I'm sure you will do well here. Be wary though, as some of the clowns from clown college escaped and now post here, and will try to initiate you into their fucked up circus act they call posts. Be stern, and don't fall for their shit. But most importantly, have fun. ☺☺

[quote=joop;%2Fbloards%2Fgbs%2Ftopics%2Freal-talk-the-bloard-thread-with-a-strict-no-irony-policy%2Fposts%2F4769] i'm trying to bulk on a renaissance periodization program but it's hard as hell to do intermittent fasting AND eat a caloric surplus on only whole/non-refined foods. i slept 12 hours straight last night. woke up, walked into the living room and looked at the clock as my eyes came into focus and sure enough it said 12:00 (i went to sleep at abt 11:45 iirc). [/quote] What is this? I just bulk by eating whatever I want whenever and occasionally lifting weights and now I have a big belly that I slap periodically whilst sitting down.

That feel when I still live in Derek's house

I've been playing a lot of Hidden my Game by Mom. It's a fun little puzzler.

[img]http://memesme.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/no-drama.jpg[/img]

My whole life is a fucking lie!!

MOD EDIT: Please do not necropost in the dead thread. Only bump if there is legitimate reason to do so. =======================THREAD LOCKED==========================================

i sprayed some ant down the drain at work today :)

"Lemme put my beer down" *camera conveniently pans and lingers on derek's large collection of expensive designer suits*

Hmm? I didn't make the cut? That's ok. I'm above such childish whimsies anyhow...

Happy New Year to you all. It's not going to get any better. It's, in fact, going to get much, much worse.